Your no BS guide to overcoming anxiety.
If there is one thing I know, it is just how impactful anxiety can be to your happiness. For years I struggled to move through the day without feelings of panic, overwhelm or fear.
This post is going to give you ALL of my "secrets" to overcoming anxiety and panic -- Seriously, this is all it took!
When I started having panic attacks, I researched everything there was to research about them. Too often, I was given results or responses such as "incurable", "lifelong", "require medication management". Today I am so grateful for the “me” in her twenties that never believed that she had to feel that way forever or rely on a medication to feel at peace. I refused to put myself into this category that google and the many stories I had heard about anxiety were telling me. Although I know that anxiety may be something that I have to be mindful of long term, I now know that is not something that has to be a “bad” or fearful thing in my life!
Now, before you meet me with resistance and tell me that "Everyone is different, people don't handle things the same way as you did", hear me out. My story will not match your story -- or maybe it will! But even if it does, our experiences are different. Our backgrounds are different & I will always acknowledge this.
That being said, there are some truths about wellness and feeling good that fit us all the same. What you do with the following information and how you apply it may be different -- but these are things that anyone with anxiety can benefit from.
Whether or not all of these resonate with or apply to you, remain open minded and trust that your body is always working for you. In order to feel good and reduce or eliminate anxiety, you have to start taking care of yourself: Mind, body and spirit.
There is no shortcut and there is no long term "quick fix". Healing anxiety takes work.
Just as a diabetic or someone with celiac disease has to change certain aspects of their life, those of us with anxiety do too. So instead of feeling bad for yourself, accept your struggle and begin taking steps to overcome it.
Let's get to it! Here are the things that I do that have made the biggest impact on my mental health and resilience to anxiety (not in any particular order).
(Outlined like this below each section are blurbs about my personal experiences with each!)
Meditation/Stillness
People often associate meditation with certain religious philosophies, and although I do love the spiritual background of meditation, it seems to deter a lot of people from actually trying it. I'm here to tell you that meditation can be whatever YOU want it to be. There are countless scientific studies in recent years (WOO!) supporting this practice and its effectiveness in boosting immunity, cultivating happiness and feelings of contentment and reducing anxiety.
If you have an anxious mind, it is essential that you are incorporating practices into your daily routine that train your mind to slow down and allow you to take back the reins to your thoughts. You have got to start taking time throughout your day to become mindful and slow down!
(I meditate daily, anywhere from 5-30 minutes at a time.)
Routine
Those of us with anxiety often thrive when we have a routine. Whether that is a routine at work or school, a routine in the morning or at bed time, a prayer or workout routine -- whatever you decide, a routine will give your brain the predictability it often needs during times of increased stress and anxiety.
Work on creating a routine that works for you and your schedule and build onto it slowly. Don't make it too complicated to start, just build onto small daily habits as it feels good! Routines work best for anxiety when you stick to them! So make them realistic for your lifestyle.
(I have a consistent morning and evening routine and a spiritual/prayer routine. I try to get to bed and wake up at the same time daily as well!)
Dietary changes
Your body responds to everything you eat. Processed foods, refined carbs and sugar all have a negative impact on our mental health. Blood glucose/insulin levels can trigger feelings of panic, and studies show that your body responds the same to sugar spikes as it does threatening events! This information shouldn't scare you, but instead empower you to make better choices.
80-90% of our serotonin is produced in our GUT you guys! Don’t focus on being perfect or going on a strict diet, just focus on making better choices on a daily basis and learn more along the way. Start with cutting processed foods, replacing sugary drinks with water and incorporating more whole foods into your diet. Again, start small and build as you go. The idea here is to make long-term and realistic changes.
(I make mindful choices every day when it comes to my diet, and supplement regularly with vitamins/minerals. This takes time, be patient. If you fall off, get back on the next day!)
Movement
Our bodies need movement. Stagnant, built up energy often comes out in the form of anxiety. It doesn’t matter what you enjoy doing, just MOVE your body! Aim for daily movement such as stretching and walking, and hit the gym or a workout class for some muscle building benefits a couple times a week. No excuses here, YouTube // walking // stretching are free and a pair of weights is $15. Start with 10 minutes a day and work up to more as you develop a practice and a routine!
(I started with Yoga. The principles and teachings were helpful for my anxious mind and I credit yoga to much of my overcoming anxiety!)
Wind downs/check-ins
When you are anxious, it helps when you are listening to the things going on in your head and getting curious about why you are feeling the way you feel. This practice can be done through journaling, meditation or therapy. When we take moments to tune in, we start to learn about ourselves. This is HUGE. When you are aware, you can pivot as needed.
Wind downs are also helpful at the end of stressful days or weeks. When you sit with the stress of the day/week for a moment, you can acknowledge it and release it so that it does not carry over into the following one. You’d be surprised what you realize you are carrying throughout the day and how much it can bring down your vibe!
(I use wind down and journaling practices weekly, often daily. I see a therapist and enroll in various coaching programs as needed)
Research/Education/Curiosity
LEARN about your anxiety. This could possibly be the #1 thing that I recommend because that’s what this entire post is really about — understanding ourselves and our anxiety so that we can better navigate it.
I don’t recommend google, unless you are mindful of what you are taking in. Podcasts and books are great for this! You can also start following empowering accounts on social media or coaches/therapist/doctors who have educational posts. The more you can become curious instead of reactive to your anxiety, the more you start to release the fear surrounding your anxious thoughts.
Learning more about anxiety also allows you to find tools that work for you! You don’t know what you don’t know, so get curious!
(This was a major factor in my healing. Books and Podcasts set me on the healing path and kept me aligned for a long time. Learning created so much peace for me and still does!)
Environment
A messy living space does not support a peaceful internal space. In Feng Shui Your Life, Jayme Barrett states that “By infusing your environment with vibrant energy and symbols of beauty, love, success and bounty, your space becomes a living, breathing manifestation of the life you want to live.” -- “Your daily stress can be greatly reduced when you minimize the chaos of the outside world by creating your own safe haven.”
Our environment is an extension of who we are. If your home is chaotic, messy and overwhelming, it will be much harder to cultivate peace and release anxiety. Get rid of clutter. Open your windows. Dust the TV stand. Vacuum regularly.
If you become anxious at work: Clean your desk space, organize your papers and incorporate things that bring you peace such as pictures, artwork or a warm-glowing salt lamp.
If you get anxious while driving: Clean out your car, play uplifting music and get your oil changed and tires rotated regularly.
These are just a couple examples of how you can influence your outer world in a way that supports your inner world! Get creative here.
(A clean space makes me happy. I feel light and peaceful in my space and am mindful of the “things” I keep around)
Relationships
Relationships play a huge role in how we are feeling. Whether it is a romantic relationship, friendship, or a family member — who we surround ourselves with has a great impact on the way we feel. Take note of the relationships that raise you up and the ones that bring you down. Sometimes someone may treat you well, but they may have habits that don’t support your own healing journey. This is not to say you have to stop talking to anyone who’s not in alignment with what you’re trying to do, unless of course they’re toxic/abusive. It simply means that you may have to create space, say no to certain activities or gain other relationships that do support your journey!
Become unapologetic about your healing guys! Say no when you need to and don’t let toxic people make you feel bad for cutting them out when needed. Overcoming anxiety requires you to get really clear about what and who is contributing to your stress/angst.
(I remain mindful of the people I surround myself with. A toxic relationship contributed to my anxiety and I wasn’t aware of it. I choose to nourish friendships that make me feel at peace and a set clear expectations in romantic relationships)
Other things to cut
Along with removing toxic relationships and processed foods, there are other things we should cut while trying to heal anxiety. These include alcohol, drugs, vapes, destructive habits, and anything else that is going to have a negative impact on your metal state/physical health. I’m not saying that a glass of wine on the weekend is going to cause anxiety — I’m simply saying that when starting this process you really want to get clear headed and see what your baseline is so that you can better gauge how these things make you feel.
Think of this like an elimination diet — if you don’t know what is causing your bloat, doctors will often suggest cutting foods out and re-introducing them later to see if you notice a difference. The same goes for these listed items. I don’t recommend vaping or using drugs ever, but things like alcohol and going out every weekend can often contribute to our negative emotions. Take a week, a month, 6 months — notice how you feel!
(Drinking never made me anxious, but early in my anxiety I chose to cut alcohol. I have not had alcohol in years!)
Become mindful of the way you speak/think
The things we say out loud and the thoughts we think matter. This isn’t about being chipper and positive all of the time — it’s about returning to baseline more efficiently and making sure that we are not wallowing in the negative thoughts/emotions for too long.
A large part of overcoming anxiety for good is re-training your brain and the thought patterns that you’ve developed. If you’re struggling with a negative mindset, fake it til you make it! Redirect your mind to a more positive thought, even if you don’t necessarily feel that way in the moment. Take “This day sucks” to “This last couple of hours has been rough” and then eventually move to “How can I improve this day”. Gradual steps! The more we learn to choose our responses/thoughts, the faster our brains will start to automatically direct our thoughts in a more productive/positive way.
(I try to regularly keep myself in check. When I’m in a negative or anxious spiral, I write positive mantras and redirect my focus to more helpful thoughts)
Develop a spiritual belief or practice
The anxious mind often clings to the unknown and what-ifs. Having a set of spiritual beliefs or practices can ground us during the hard times. Human beings need a sense of their spiritual self, in my opinion — or at least a realization that their energy matters and turning to a place of love and trust is essential to the human spirit and healing.
This will be different for everyone! We aren’t just our physical self — we are also a part of something “bigger”. It doesn’t have to be a specific religion, you can learn about/believe in various philosophies if that resonates with you more! Trusting that you are guided, intuitive, supported or whatever you believe, can bring a level of peace that you wouldn’t otherwise have access to.
(Early in my journey, the philosophies in Buddhism brought me a lot of peace. I now have a spiritual routine and practices that keep me trusting and grounded — and I am so grateful for those!)
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That’s it guys! I could write a book about each of these sections, so pick one or two and dive into them! I’m sure there are other items not on this list we could add, but these are tangible, basic items you can start incorporating today.
Don’t underestimate the power of a SINGLE action — a SINGLE step in the right direction. Overtime you will start to apply more of these, if not all of them! Wherever you are at in your journey right now, just START!